Oh.
My.
God.
I used to love going to the gym, you know. 8 years ago, I was 20kgs lighter and a BEAST. I loved popping my earphones in, putting on some rap, turning up the treadmill, bike, or cross-trainer to an intermediate level and boom – smash it. I worked out for 1.5 hours every single day – a combo of cardio and weights.
Today?
My goal was to compete an easy 30 minute workout. I was going to be gentle on myself. 30 minutes should be “a walk in the park”, right?
Nope.
7 minutes in, and I was soaked in sweat. I was on the lowest training level on the cross-trainer, and every part of my body was screaming, “We need to leave!!!”
It wasn’t just difficult, it was physically painful. I felt like my body was being pummelled and it hurt sooo much.
I’ve never experienced this before.
I’ve never felt miserable at the gym.
But I pushed it. I kept saying to myself “do 1 more minute” until I’d done 20 minutes. Then “Do 5 more, then you can leave” and at 25 minutes with blood pulsing in my ears (when you can hear your own heartbeat in your ears, you know you’re pushing your body to the limits), I was mentally screaming at myself “Don’t you dare fucking quit! You’re so close to finishing this half hour. COME ON!!!”
And I did it.
Yes, I was bent over and barely pumping the pedals, but I did it.
Back again tomorrow for a 30 minute cycle.
Wish me luck.
Photo of me 8 years ago: (on my way to the local gym).
"I get knocked down, but I get up again" 
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