Navigating stormy, unfamiliar waters

I’ve been blessed in my life because I’ve never lost anyone close to me. I wasn’t aware just how special that was until my Dad died, you know. I get angry at God – my first experience losing someone in my life and it couldn’t be an old high school buddy, Lord? It couldn’t beContinue reading “Navigating stormy, unfamiliar waters”

It’s been a week since my Dad died

It’s been a week since my Dad died. I’m always in pain. I’m always grieving. Some days I cry, some days I feel numb but there’s always a painful hole in my heart and when the wind blows – as it often does during Perth winter – it hurts like a bastard. I keep goingContinue reading “It’s been a week since my Dad died”

Making hard choices

February 07, 2020 I’m the one responsible for my life and 98% of me wants it just to end. I just want to stop. Please. I think the last few months have really battered me. What’s killing me now is pure exhaustion. I haven’t stopped. I’ve moved from job to job to job – takingContinue reading “Making hard choices”

Sore thumb

October 23, 2019 Something about being in Coles supermarket sets my bum off. I don’t know what it is. Probably because my ass hates me and wants to poo when I’m the furtherest away from a working toilet possible. This time, a toilet was only about 500 meters away. Lucky me. So I was inContinue reading “Sore thumb”

JD. For the love of God…REST!!!

October 19, 2019 Before I start complaining, I’ve had a really good few days off. It’s been so good to wake up when I naturally am awake and not in a panic when my alarm goes off for work. It’s been nice to do a ‘full makeup’ look on my face because I can takeContinue reading “JD. For the love of God…REST!!!”

Carving out time for myself

October 16, 2019 My whole life, I feel like I’m caging myself. Watching what I say.Being careful to be soft, quiet and pleasing.Being what everyone needs me to be so much I forget who I actually am.I am so locked into being ‘liked’ that I spend my life – my whole life – playing whatever role isContinue reading “Carving out time for myself”

Bruised reed

October 16, 2019 I feel like a bruised reed in a rice patty field. Just barely hanging in there as the water rushes past me. My roots desperately gripping the watery soil and when the wind blows…well…it’s just a matter of time before I come apart completely. Just a matter of time before I loseContinue reading “Bruised reed”

Make lemons from lemonade

October 13, 2019 Have you ever actually tried making lemonade? IT. IS. A. BASTARD. To get the quantities just right and to make it something palatable and not disgusting takes work. A lot of work. So, to whoever said “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade” – SCREW YOU, MAN. What if you don’t evenContinue reading “Make lemons from lemonade”