February 03, 2020 I have been holding it all inside – deep, deep down for so long now that I need to blog. I need to let some of this pain out. On Christmas eve I tried to kill myself by overdosing on panadol. Christmas day was the worst day I’ve ever had in aContinue reading “The down low”
October 29, 2019 Okay. I’ll try another run at this. Have you ever leaned back in your chair and leaned that bit too far and almost toppled over? But then you caught yourself in time and stopped it? That panicked “OMG” feeling – that rush of fear? Normally people feel it for just a fewContinue reading “Losing George – take 2”
October 26, 2019 First, we’ll start with “Amos”. The facts:Amos of late has been ‘too friendly’ with me. Too familiar in the way he treats me and talks to me. I hate it. I guess that yeah, in some cases, you can meet a person and both hit it off. You can talk for hours on theContinue reading “Losing George and I can’t get rid of Amos no matter how hard I try”
I’m temping for the week at the Children’s Hospital, screening any and all guests with Covid questions and asking everyone to sign into the “SafeWA” app. It’s a busy job on the main entrance and in Emergency, but absolutely perfect on one of the wards with hardly any visitors – because then I earn aContinue reading “Just…really cool”
October 23, 2019 Something about being in Coles supermarket sets my bum off. I don’t know what it is. Probably because my ass hates me and wants to poo when I’m the furtherest away from a working toilet possible. This time, a toilet was only about 500 meters away. Lucky me. So I was inContinue reading “Sore thumb”
October 19, 2019 Before I start complaining, I’ve had a really good few days off. It’s been so good to wake up when I naturally am awake and not in a panic when my alarm goes off for work. It’s been nice to do a ‘full makeup’ look on my face because I can takeContinue reading “JD. For the love of God…REST!!!”
October 16, 2019 My whole life, I feel like I’m caging myself. Watching what I say.Being careful to be soft, quiet and pleasing.Being what everyone needs me to be so much I forget who I actually am.I am so locked into being ‘liked’ that I spend my life – my whole life – playing whatever role isContinue reading “Carving out time for myself”
October 16, 2019 I feel like a bruised reed in a rice patty field. Just barely hanging in there as the water rushes past me. My roots desperately gripping the watery soil and when the wind blows…well…it’s just a matter of time before I come apart completely. Just a matter of time before I loseContinue reading “Bruised reed”
October 13, 2019 Have you ever actually tried making lemonade? IT. IS. A. BASTARD. To get the quantities just right and to make it something palatable and not disgusting takes work. A lot of work. So, to whoever said “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade” – SCREW YOU, MAN. What if you don’t evenContinue reading “Make lemons from lemonade”
October 10, 2019 Yesterday, I sat in a window alcove on one of the busiest streets in the city and cried. I didn’t just cry, by the way – I wailed. I howled. Tears didn’t fall daintily down my cheeks – they poured. I didn’t care. This is me at my lowest point. I have justContinue reading “Broken”
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