These blogs are my heart online.
Welcome to the inner workings of my heart and mind xx
I’ve been wanting to write and catch you up on what the “life of Janet” has been like lately but I haven’t had the motivation or creativity required. For that, I’m sorry. But I’m here now 🙂 Here’s what’s been going on: Life as I know it has been really, really hard. Depression has gottenContinue reading “So much to catch you up on”
All I wanted for FIVE LONG DAYS was a letter from my psychiatrist saying I was not a nutcase and was able to make rational decisions in court. My Lawyers demand it before they will help me prepare for Trial on Wednesdsay. Given that NO ONE works on weekends, I have FOUR DAYS now toContinue reading “On the edge”
I completed 7 full days. I asked – in great trauma and distress – on the 7th day to be released to go home as I was the most suicidal and out of control I’ve been in years and it was due to the treatment I received in hospital. First let’s do the pros andContinue reading “My week in a fancy psych ward”
I’ve been in hospital almost a week now. I’m fed up. I want to go home. I’m scared out of my mind, anxious, FURIOUS, exhausted and sick to death of f**king “group therapy” which is a complete f**king waste of time, yet it takes up most of my days. My “therapist” has only seen meContinue reading “This is it, then.”
As fancy as my “Suite” here is, the pillows are inflatable and very uncomfortable so I didn’t get much sleep last night. Have you ever tried to sleep with a BALLOON as your pillow? It’s infuriating. Especially after a long day when all you want to do is sleep. Apart from that, it seems toContinue reading “My 1st full day in a Psych Ward”
I’ve been in so much mental anguish for so long that I knew I had to reach out for help. I asked my Doctor to write me a referral to 4 of the Private Psych Hospitals here in Perth and God made a way because I got admitted to HC yesterday afternoon. I shook asContinue reading “I’ve been admitted to a Private psych ward”
Getting up from the very bottom of this dark, dank pit is really, really hard. But I’m trying, and that’s enough. I’ve called a few job agencies and let them know I’m available for work (am I, though?) I’m here. I’m still alive. I’d HONESTLY RATHER NOT BE, but there you go. Everything I thoughtContinue reading “Painfully getting back UP”
The past few weeks have been too much for me. Just TOO MUCH. Too much hurt and shame. Too much grief. Too much depression and too much anxiety. On Sunday around lunchtime, Alun got a reminder on his phone about his friend’s birthday party. It wasn’t going to start until 3pm but Alun wanted toContinue reading “My whole world has fallen apart.”
I’m usually very quiet. I’m polite. I’m gently spoken and I try to promote kindness and peace wherever I go. But today? TODAY EVERYBODY CAN GET FUCKED. I mean that with every fibre of my being. I hate this stupid fucking world. I hate my life. I hate how I try my best to loveContinue reading “Raging”
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