Can I have your pens?

So there I was, sitting across from my new psychologist, talking about my struggle between absolutely hating myself on the one hand and thinking I’m pretty damn close to perfection on the other hand. It’s a hard line to walk when I’m my worst enemy and my biggest advocate at the same time. All day.Continue reading “Can I have your pens?”

Taking a knife to a gun fight

I’m a lover, not a fighter…so when it comes to sticking up for myself when battling against bullies, I’ve lost every. single. time. Here’s why I think I keep losing: I don’t get better artillery. I am literally going into gun fights with a plastic knife. Artillery in this case is information on WTF isContinue reading “Taking a knife to a gun fight”

I get knocked down, but I get up again

And that’s the important thing, isn’t it? To get back up. Last week at work, I got a severe bollocking from my boss. It was about 15 minutes of awfulness where she listed fault after fault after fault of mine (a lot of them untrue and uncalled for, by the way) and I just listenedContinue reading “I get knocked down, but I get up again”

Saying goodbye to my parents

“How far away are you?” Alun asked over the phone. I could hear his smile and it made me smile, too. “Hmm…maybe a few minutes. I’m glad you called because I’m a bit lost…where on earth is Dirty Nellies???” Alun laughed “It’s on a little hidden lane way…where abouts are you?” “Across from the MantraContinue reading “Saying goodbye to my parents”

A Dummy’s guide to Social Anxiety

In case you have someone in your life with depression and/or anxiety, I wanted to write a guide to hopefully help you know how to deal with them when a social occasion arises. Stick to the plan. If you’ve invited a friend to lunch, DON’T SURPRISE THEM WITH a sky-diving experience. Obviously I’m being aContinue reading “A Dummy’s guide to Social Anxiety”

On my hands and knees, struggling

I’m not there yet…not as bad as I was in June 2017…but I’m close. Because I feel like I’m crawling through life on my hand and knees. I heard someone describe depression once as “a video game – we are all in a video game and everyone has been given instructions and are starting onContinue reading “On my hands and knees, struggling”