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"I get knocked down, but I get up again"

RAGING

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janetdthomas77

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I definitely think I need to see a Doctor, my emotions are swirling constantly and I’m a ball of RAGE just lately – every day, small things are making me want to hurl desk items at the wall.

I think when I’ve taken certain anti-depressants over a long period of time, my body starts to get used to them and they don’t have the effects they used to. That, coupled with taking on a brand-new addiction of coca-cola (ARGGHHHH!!!!) which is full of sugar and CAFFIENE which I’m not used to – is making me an unstable person to be around.

The woman I work with – she’s in her 60’s – drives me absolutely MENTAL, for instance. Let’s call her “Kara”. The other day, she’d made cupcakes and wanted me to have one.

Okay. Thanks for that.

“I want to see you eat it and see your reaction” Kara said, HOLDING THE CUPCAKE UP TO MY LIPS while I was at my desk processing an invoice.

“No thank you, not just now, Kara” I dodged the cupcake but my anger was definitely building at her pushiness; (Can’t you see I’m literally working right now?!!!) “Would it be okay to just leave it on my desk and I’ll have a little nibble later? I have a lot of invoices this morning”

“Just try a bite” and as she ignored my polite request, Kara started to unwrap the paper around the cupcake. Now she was touching my food. I don’t know about you, but I DON’T LIKE THAT. I think it’s really intrusive and it crosses a lot of personal boundaries for me. Social, as well.

Kara held the now unwrapped chocolate cupcake out to me – only a inch away from my mouth “Try it”.

I WAS SO MAD.

“Kara” I tried again, this time taking deep, even breaths because I could feel my arms shaking and my hands were balling into fists “I can’t just now – please could you let me get on with my work, I’d really appreciate it”

KARA IGNORED ME.

SHE FORCED THE CUPCAKE INTO MY MOUTH.

I almost choked, it was so unexpected!

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ARE YOU DOING, KARA?!?

But the polite me – the people pleaser – ALLOWED IT TO HAPPEN.

“Oh…um…that’s lovely” I said, hastily wiping crumbs off and trying to tidy my desk surface so I didn’t get chocolate all over the important documents I was working on.

“Go on, have another bite” Kara PUT HER HANDS ON MY FOOD AGAIN and lifted her brown abomination up to my mouth.

I’M GOING TO FUCKING FLOOR YOU IN A MINUTE, KARA.

I pushed it away. Gently.

Take deep breaths, JD…deeeeeeeep breaths. Be calm. Come on now…calm down.

“Kara – I have so much to do” (SO DO YOU, YOU FUCKING MUPPET! WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?!? WHY???) “Can you please let me carry on with these invoices? I’m sure the cupcake is lovely – please give me some space”

Kara had the gall to look offended “But I made these myself”

I DON’T FUCKING CARE IF BEYONCE MADE THEM. GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME BEFORE I FUCKING END YOU.

“I can appreciate that, but please. Please respect my boundaries and please give me some space – I have a lot to do”

Kara flashed me an angry look.

Really? REALLY???

THEN COME AT ME, BRUH. You might even live to regret it.

But she did back away in the end.

And I sat at my desk FUMING because I felt like ‘the bad guy’.

I can’t go on like this, guys. I’m going to end up in jail.

14 responses to “RAGING”

  1. Catwoman=^••^= Avatar
    Catwoman=^••^=

    Wow! That was absolutely unbelievable. Something must really be wrong with her to do that to you. She showed complete disrespect. Can you go to HR and file a complaint about her.
    I’m like you. I would more than likely end up in prison

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. janetdthomas77 Avatar
      janetdthomas77

      I’m so glad I’m not going crazy, Catwoman. To me, it felt like TOO MUCH. I should have said something as it was happening. I feel really angry about it and every day since, this same woman has really angered me. She gets into my personal space as we work – even though it’s a huge office – and she will follow me around talking in a ‘baby voice’ which really winds me up. I feel like I can’t go to HR and say “hey listen – this particular woman I work with in the Information Counter is really ANNOYING” I don’t feel I have grounds to raise any serious concerns 😦

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Catwoman=^••^= Avatar
        Catwoman=^••^=

        Instead of simply saying that she’s annoying, tell them,

        “She’s disrupting the work environment AND in the long run that’ll bring productivity down and ultimately cost the company.”

        By now, businesses ought to know that anyone like that can drive a person to retaliate in a negative manner. Look at the number of school shootings, many because of being bullied. There are also plenty of examples of adults doing the same thing because of anger at a co-worker or boss. Sadly, most of this happens in the US.

        Granted, many of these people do have mental health issues, but in a lot of cases (not in all cases) these people end up being triggered by them.

        Many times if a situation is let to go too far, there’s no telling what that may drive a person to do. Of course, I’m not talking about you. I’m just talking in general. Just remember when you do go to HR don’t bring your assault rifle! LOL!

        Okay, here’s the scenario:

        Ms. Twuddlebum: “Hello, Ms. Thomas! How are you doing today?”

        Ms. Thomas: “I’m okay. How are you?”

        Ms. Twuddlebum: “I’m doing well, thank you! So, what brings you here today?”

        Ms. Thomas: “I’m here to talk with you about a certain employee.”

        Ms. Twuddlebum: “Really?” What’s going on?”

        Ms. Thomas: “She’s extremely disruptive thus making the work environment very tense and strained for everyone.”

        Ms. Twuddlebums: “What exactly is she doing?”

        Ms. Thomas: “On a regular basis she comes over to my desk, seeing that I’m in the middle of something, and continually bothers me with silly nonsense. She won’t listen to me when I tell her to leave. By the time she does, I’m on edge making it difficult to resume my work. She’s disrespectful and loves to stir things up. It’s just not conducive to a positive work environment. It’s very stressful. I believe that her propensity toward interrupting us from doing our jobs, this will affect the productivity of our company and in the long-run will cost this company money.”

        Ms Twuddlebums: “Thank you for bringing this to our attention, Ms. Thomas. We’ll definitely look into it. Oh, and Ms. Thomas?”

        Ms. Thomas: “Yes, Ms Twuddlebums?

        Ms. Twuddlebums: “I appreciate you leaving your assault rifle at home.”

        Liked by 2 people

  2. 1972italy Avatar
    1972italy

    I hate it when people do that! You did better than I would’ve! If someone gets in my face and space I get a bit bitchy. And I push back. Fortunately the people I work with understand that and will back off. You are NOT the bad guy here! You actually handled things better than she did! Big hugs from the Great White North xxx

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
    1. janetdthomas77 Avatar
      janetdthomas77

      Thank you for understanding. I honestly thought I was losing my mind. I didn’t like being forced to eat something, I felt like all my rights had been taken away. I often bring treats into work but I’ll put the cookies/muffins whatever on the bench top in the kitchen and leave a note “please help yourselves” so that people are given the independence and autonomy to choose for themselves if they want the snack or not. I would have appreciated the same from Kara xx

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply
  3. Thotaramani Avatar
    Thotaramani

    I really appreciate you Janetdthomas for d cool way of tackling the situation. 💐💯 . Sometimes we need to adjust and rest leave it God. 👍🏻

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
    1. janetdthomas77 Avatar
      janetdthomas77

      So true, Thotaramani. God knows what’s best xx

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Thotaramani Avatar
        Thotaramani

        💐❤️🌹👍🏻

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Tommy T. Avatar
    Tommy T.

    It is her, and not you that has issues. You are not going crazy or losing your mind. She is off the hook. You are allowed to be pissed off when someone violates your personal and professional space. Especially if it happens at the same time. This sounds like an issue for HR. HUGS Janet.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  5. janetdthomas77 Avatar
    janetdthomas77

    Hello there Tommy! Thank you for reading and for being so kind and so supportive. I’m not usually so outraged, but that woman pressed ALL my buttons and I struggled to reign my anger in. I’ve decided that if she does it again, I’ll speak to our Manager about it. Big hugs to you and Dawn xx

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Tommy T. Avatar
      Tommy T.

      I would always like to see coworkers address interpersonal situations on their own and decide on a solution. There are for sure times that this will not work and going to your manager is a great place to go if you are comfortable. The next time this or anything happens, ask why twice. Why would the person be doing this to me. For you, why is it important to me to resolve. This pause to ask the questions will provide space to think, calm down, and be in a better frame of mind. It will also provide you with an opportunity to put yourself in their shoes. If the person continues to torment you for sadistic reasons, at least you can be comfortable that you did everything you could to resolve the issue and help to reduce the mental torment that we did not do enough. Keep me up to date and feel free to reach out anytime with questions. Hugs of patience and strength to you.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  6. janetdthomas77 Avatar
    janetdthomas77

    You have such a kindness and a sweet spirit, Tommy. I’m either going to try to see it compassionately from the other person’s point of view and allow them to absolutely ruin my day, telling myself that I’M the problem and feeling miserable – or threaten to “end them” – and quite possibly get taken to HR myself. Hahahhaa. The cupcake lady is in her 60’s and going through a messy divorce that she wants to talk about non-stop for the 9 hours we work together. I tried to be compassionate and listen and be there for her, but found I was doing 90% of the work while she just followed me around complaining about her ex. I can’t cope! I have asked her to please let me work and told her to please see a counselor but she seems to be intent on TELLING ME and NOT DOING ANY WORK. I think it really is an issue now for HR – it’s been 5 long weeks and I’ve had enough.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Tommy T. Avatar
      Tommy T.

      That is a long time and if they have not taken the time to listen and respect your space physically and emotionally, then for sure it sounds like it is time to take it to the next level. Sounds like you have been more than patient and kind with her. I can see why you have had enough. Time for “protective” Janet to step in and help her friend “kind and patient” Janet. Take care my friend. Hugs.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. janetdthomas77 Avatar
        janetdthomas77

        Big hugs right back, Tommy. I hope the feisty side of me doesn’t take things too far and minds her manners. I’ll update you as I go along. Lol. Wish me luck…and hide the matches.

        Liked by 1 person

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