Honestly? I thought my alter ego would have a sexier name – Vivienne or Alexandra…Giselle or Arabella…something that would suit the little sexy minx I keep in my heart. ‘She’ comes out when I’ve lost weight and can rock tight indigo jeans, a crisp white shirt, sexy high-heeled sandals and some well-suited sunglasses on my beautiful head.
So “Sharon” isn’t really the name I thought my sexy alter ego would have…and yet that’s the one she named herself with, so Imma go with it.
It started with a girl in my previous job as Telecommunications Officer for the Hospital. There was a young girl there – maybe early 20’s – and her name was Sharon. She stood with authority; tall and lean. She had a steely gaze. Sharon knew what she wanted and how to get it. There was something powerful about her and she didn’t flaunt it or shout about it, but something about her made me think she was capable of climbing the highest mountain if she wanted to. I admired that about her. We weren’t friends and she probably didn’t even notice me, but boy did I notice her.
I especially noticed her assertiveness. Her honesty. If Sharon didn’t like something, she’d literally say “I don’t like that”. No apology or over-explanation as to why. Just said plainly stated what she thought. It amazed me how it seemed to easy for Sharon to just be truthful. I struggle with telling people what I really think for fear it will hurt/offend them, so I try to keep on the ‘sweet’ side when giving feedback/my opinion – but Sharon could simply just tell the truth and there was nothing rude or offensive in it.
You can tell the truth and not come across as a stuck up b*tch. Huh. I never knew.
One example that stands out to me is when our Managers were giving out shift allocations for the following week or fortnight (I’m just a temp so I didn’t get shifts). Our manager – we’ll go with “Sarah” asked Sharon “Hey, are you able to work the later shift on Friday night?”.
That moment – for me – suspended itself in time. I thought “Gosh, I don’t think anyone likes a late shift on a Friday night…but we all seem to just accept whatever is offered, whether we like it or not – especially when it comes to work” and I wondered how Sharon would navigate this.
If I had been asked, I would have immediately answered “Sure, no worries” on auto-pilot and inside would be screaming: “NO THANKS. NOT ON YOUR LIFE!” but I want to please my bosses. I want to be seen as a “team player” and I want to be agreeable because it means I avoid conflict.
Sharon, though? She did something incredible.
“No, I’m not available that night” she said.
No “Oh Gosh, I’m really sorry, but….” no overly long/apologetic explanation.
Just “No, I’m not available that night“.
I remember I stood there, watching Sarah and Sharon with my mouth open, I was in shock that such a thing could happen. Is this where Sharon would lose her job? Would Sarah say “Excuse me, what?” and they’d have to face off? Would they yell or just disagree until Sarah got what she wanted from her employee?
“Okay no worries” Sarah shifted her gaze around the room “Are you available, Jaxon?”
“Will I get overtime?” Jaxon called back from across the office.
Sarah rolled her eyes affectionately. She and Jaxon were really close.
“You will, yes” she answered.
“Then put me down for that shift, I need the money” Jaxon answered.
And just like that, Sarah moved away to help someone on a call.
Sharon adjusted her headset and took another call.
The whole thing took probably 30 seconds, but will forever be cemented in my mind…because Sharon said NO, didn’t apologise, didn’t explain why she’d said no – and IT WAS OKAY.
To this day it astounds me.
I would love to have that much confidence that I can say “no” to something so simply. Sharon wasn’t rude. She didn’t say “F*ck no” or “Nah mate”. She just said NO and moved on with her day like it was nothing at all.
I mentally filed that moment away in my head, promising myself that as much as possible, I needed to “be like Sharon“. Simple. HONEST. Assertive but not aggressive. Just like that.
Also, the other day Sharon Osborne was on Michael McIntyre’s “Big show” and they did my favourite segment where Michael takes their phone and does an embarrassing message and ‘sends to all’ on that star’s contact list. SHARON LOOKED INCREDIBLE. I want to say she’s in her 60’s now? (Older???) yet Sharon looked like a beautiful, strong, vibrant, stunning warrior. Bright, shining blue eyes, a thin body and a gorgeous face with smooth skin. JUST SOOO PRETTY!!!
It gave me hope that we don’t have to be in our 20’s and 30’s to be stunning…because Sharon is definitely not a young lady anymore – but oh my word, she was ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS. I couldn’t take my eyes off her. Michael was teasing her about her latest plastic surgery “I like your new face” and she dealt with it with grace and humour “Me too! My Surgeon’s wonderful”…so it’s not all natural….but it is POSSIBLE and that’s the part I’ll hang onto.
I’m going to be 46 this April…but that doesn’t mean I can’t strive to be the most beautiful – SEXY – version of myself.
It’s possible for Sharon…so I can do it, too.
My goal this year is to BE LIKE SHARON. Lol. Speak my truth without apology or explanation and strive to be my most gorgeous self – because it’s not dependant on age.