"I get knocked down, but I get up again"

It’s hard to write today’s blog because it hurts my heart to remember back to the abusive relationship I was in and how much pain I went through at the time.

I wrote a chapter about Anne in my Memoir but watching appleTV’s series “The Shrink next door” and seeing a sweet, vulnerable man go through a similar abuse with the psychologist he trusted is absolutely heart breaking.

I thought abuse only happened in families or in romantic relationships. It is shocking to see the relationship in “The Shrink next door” unfold between two men who are supposedly friends. I thought Anne was my friend too and when she put me through a year of hell, Anne had me so messed up, confused and abused that I didn’t understand she was systematic in her subtle destruction of my entire life. Abuse can happen between friends, too. Make no mistake. Someone you trust who is rotten on the inside will see your vulnerability and sweet nature and they’ll take and take from you until there is nothing left but debris.

It was so painful in the episode I watched where Marty takes his trusted “friend” to his summer home. Ike (the psychologist) uses Marty, hurts him, makes him cry and then ultimately glances down with a smug smile when he sees Marty chopping down the Family cherry blossom tree that represented his loving family’s history because Ike wanted it so. I had to cover my mouth, it was so painful to see a beautiful part of Marty’s life being destroyed by the person who loved it but who was ultimately being controlled by someone he thought was his best friend.

I see you, Marty. My best friend did the same to me. Anne made me cry and then made me feel it was MY fault so that I’D end up apologising for the hurt she inflicted in every area of my life.

Oh Marty…how I shouted at the screen “No! Don’t do it!” as I watched you chop your own beloved cherry blossom tree down because Ike convinced you it was something that you needed to remove…even after you so eloquently pleaded to keep it and very clearly explained how much it meant to you and to generations of your family.

I don’t think I’ll ever fully recover from what Anne put me through. My hope as I watch Ike take more and more from Marty is that Marty gets the courage to fight for his life before Ike destroys it all.

Please run as fast and as far away as you can from that evil man, Marty. Breaks my heart to see you used and abused the way I was.