"I get knocked down, but I get up again"

I’ve cried EVERY SINGLE DAY since my Dad passed away and I can’t keep blogging about my grief. Although I feel it every day – a heavy rock on my heart, reminding me my Dad is GONE and I will NEVER see his lovely face again...I need to at least try to write about something happy.

I need to count my blessings so I don’t lose my mind.

(and there are SO MANY things to be grateful for. For that, I thank you Jesus)

So today, I want to share my favourite things with you. Get a cup of tea, get a snack (I love donuts and chunky cookies, myself) and get ready.

I love long car/bus/train/plane trips. I love sitting by the window and watching life go by. I love that I can travel long distances without having to move. I love being able to see what life offers (gorgeous scenery) from the comfort and relative safety of my seat. I like being on trains and watching the passengers – I wonder why they dressed the way they do – what they’re doing on their phones – are they going home to somewhere they are welcomed or do they go home to war zone? Did they get to eat today or are they hungry and homeless but neatly dressed so that no one knows? I love people watching and I love it most when I can sit and do it.

I saw a girl on the train right across from me yesterday. She was very overweight and had a long fringe that covered her entire face. She was in a navy blue high school uniform and had tiny hands compared to the rest of her body. I won’t judge…I have little kid’s hands. I don’t think they’ve grown any bigger since I was about 15 years old, bless me. Anyway. This girl. Her head was down and I thought she probably got bullied a lot. I wondered if she had any friends. She was scrolling madly on her phone. It made me think she was playing game as that kind of scrolling was to spin a wheel of some kind…surely it wasn’t to get through Instagram posts as quickly as possible? This girl tapped away very quickly every now and then between furious scrolling. I did wonder what she was doing. I wondered if anyone was online bullying her and my heart went out to her. I hope she got home safe. I hope when she got home, her parents hugged her tight. I hope she got to pull up a bar seat at the kitchen island of her lovely home and listen to her parents as they sang and told jokes in a bright, warm, loving kitchen.

I see the same people on my train journeys to and from work every day, you know. One of them is a guy who towers over me at about 6 feet. He’s slightly chubby and wears his hair in a ponytail. It’s a short ponytail. He has glasses and brown, unkempt hair. When I’ve accidentally bumped into him in the past few weeks (it’s hard not to when we all rush off the train and head for the same escalator every morning), he’s been annoyed. I’ve of course taken this personally and gotten annoyed back.

Today, God showed me a different side to that guy. Today, he was saying goodbye to who I presume was his daughter – a young girl in a school uniform. As she turned to leave and had her back to him, he reached out and gently touched the palm of his hand to the back of her head. He smiled lovingly as he did it. Seeing that really touched my heart. That was really beautiful and I feel honoured to have witnessed that.

I love being around books, so Libraries and Bookstores are my favourite places to go. Especially Libraries…because FREE ACCESS to LOADS of amazing stories. How freaking AMAZING is that, please? I love it. Whoever invented a Library needs a big hug from me. I think even if you’re homeless, you can get a library card. Before Alun gifted me with my own rose-gold MacBook Pro (I named her “Rosie”), I used to go to the Library every weekend to write my Memoir. What I liked a lot is that the State Library had free computers/internet and these amazing comfy-looking long cushioned benches that a few homeless people had clued into. They would come in, lay down and be asleep in minutes (often snoring loudly, bless them). I think they found the perfect place to sleep because you have to be QUIET in a Library and they were surrounded in studious people who were probably a lot less likely to rob/hurt them than other homeless people out on a cold night here in Perth. The Library is also air-conditioned so was a really comfortable place to go in the Summer heat.

As for books…oh man. They are MAGICAL. A book can transport you in time and place. With a book, you can visit other lands, other worlds, other people…you have a window into other lives – other hopes, dreams, fears, ADVENTURES, romances, failures and successes. You can sit on a comfy sofa and you can travel millions of miles away without having to leave your living room. You can also eat and drink your favourite comfort foods as you do so. It’s PERFECT, you guys. I love to read. I love books. Even just HOLDING a book brings my anxiety right down.

And omg the SMELL of a book? I love it. The older the book, the better.

I love stationery – especially writing and note card sets. OMG I love them so much! I love well-made, high quality writing paper with pretty patters and thoughtful notecards that I can give to all my loved ones. As I write them, I’m giggling away excitedly to myself; imagining them opening up their mailbox and expecting the usual bills and junk mail when suddenly, a little envelope with a hummingbird, a lady beetle or bumble bee, a lush floral border or pretty butterflies with golden wings on it catches their attention.

Oh.

For me?

Yes, for you! Hahahaha I love it! I love to let people I love know I’m thinking of them and send them good thoughts and wishes on paper. It’s a beautiful art – letter writing – and I worry it will be forgotten forever in this digital age, so I do my best to keep it going. On the flip side, I LOVE getting letters/cards in the post and when my friends (which they often do, bless them) send me something – It makes my entire week and I keep those cards and letters ALL MY LIFE. Seriously. I have boxes and boxes filled with them in my room and whenever Depression gets a hold of me, I take the boxes out to remind myself I am loved. I am worthy. It cheers me up to no end to see all the letters with “Janet” lovingly written on the envelopes.

So much yes.

Gift-wrapped presents. That’s my jam. That’s what I came for. I love them. I love giving presents only slightly more than getting them. I take so much care when choosing a gift, thinking of the person I’m getting it for, dwelling deeply on the person they are and what would make them most happy. When I buy something for someone I love – OMG THE EXCITEMENT. I am SO HAPPY to get them something. I love wrapping a gift in beautiful, well made gift wrapping paper and I use ALL the embellishments. You have no idea. I have a stash of silk ribbons in all colours and sizes. I have stickers galore and beautiful, delicate matching gift tags. By the time I’m finished with the wrapping, it looks almost as good as the gift inside. So good.

Gardening. There is nothing (to me, anyway) more lovely than planting something and watching it grow. I love growing flowers, herbs, vegetables, fruit…anything! I love seeing little flower petals bloom and picking blueberries from our bush “bobble” when he yields his little blue ‘candies’ in season is so much fun. I love running my hand through the soft, bright green chamomile plant we have (it’s only a seedling so has loads of growing to do yet) because it smells like sweet apples. SO GOOD. I love even watching our grass grow. I love potting new seedlings and getting stuck into the fresh soil we got from Bunnings. I love the feeling of weeding/tidying the garden and thinking I did a great job. I love how tired it makes me and how happy and grateful for life. I love sitting in the garden on a cool summer’s day or a warm and bright winter’s one. I love being surrounded in flowers and plants – in life. It’s so good for my heart.

I love, love, love the beach. I love seeing and hearing the waves. I don’t necessarily like being in the water (it legit has to be a really hot day or I just dip my feet in – no swimming!) but I love to sit by water. Any large body of water, really – a big lake or by a waterfall or running, bubbling stream…omg it’s the bomb. I love it so much.

My friends. I don’t know why they are so low down on my list of things I love because I am legit obsessed with my friends. I love each and every one of them so much. I suffer with social anxiety so before the meet-up, I’m a ball of nerves and it’s hard to force myself to go out, but once I’m with a friend – everything is okay. I love my friends sooo much. They have so much warmth, integrity, intelligence, wisdom, humour and they’re all sooo good looking. I’m not even kidding.