"I get knocked down, but I get up again"

Patrick was handsome, smart, funny and kind. When he wanted to take me out on a date, I was so excited!

“I’ll pick you up from the train station after work – is that cool?”

It was fine with me. I guess it gave me a little more agency and independence and I was excited for spending time with him no matter how I got to his house, so I happily agreed.

Later that evening, I was getting dressed at home, dancing along to my favourite songs and thinking of the evening ahead when Patrick texted again “I can’t wait to see you – is it okay if I pick you up from your house?”

Oh my heart. That’s a little bit cute. “Sure” I texted, adding my address and a smiley face.

Come get me, Patrick 😉

He picked me up in his work van which I actually liked because he wasn’t trying to be something he wasn’t. He was honest and open and that sat well with me. We sat together in the front and I liked the clean ‘just showered’ scent of him. Patrick leaned across the seats to kiss me gently “Hey”.

Well, hey.

It was dark and we drove to his house as his favourite music played on the radio – some kind of dance/techno beats? I have no idea what genre of music it was, but I enjoyed seeing Patrick bob his head and smile at his favourite parts. This guy was so handsome and there was such an ease about him that made me feel comfortable.

Subtly, I took in Patrick’s handsome face. Big blue/green eyes, bald – which I didn’t ever think I’d like but it really suited him, and a kindness in his smile. Patrick was wearing dark blue tracksuit pants and a blue/grey t-shirt. Relaxed, casual but still really nice. He was tall at 6 feet, had an athletic build (I was loving his muscly arms. Ooft!) and had really nice hands. I guess I’m a ‘hands’ girl, I notice that most about guys I’m with.

In the darkness, Patrick pointed out the window “Check out the beach”

I suppressed a smile. I couldn’t see a thing.

“I love the beach, hey? How good is it?” Patrick smiled and looked so happy about it that I didn’t want to remind him it was 8:30pm at night and pitch dark outside apart from evenly placed street lights. I just returned his smile and nodded back.

We got to Patrick’s house and he opened the door for me. I was going into the home of someone I didn’t know, but I had such a peace about it. His house was small but really tidy and well kept. Tonx the cat wandered out to assess me, was quickly bored and wandered away again.

“How do you feel about salmon?” Patrick called from the kitchen.

“I like it?” I called back, smiling as I took in the photos he had around his living room of groups of friends with big smiles on their faces. Patrick cooked for us both that night – salmon strips with crispy skin and a small salad on the side. I don’t like salad but I ate it because I was grateful Patrick had made it. The salmon was delicious. Patrick cleared the table and we sat in the living room on his L-shaped couch watching tv and just talking. It was actually really, really nice. Nothing flashy but it was so sweet in it’s every-day-ness.

After a long day of work, I was tiring quickly. I changed into my pajamas (Patrick said they were “Cute”) and told Patrick I was going to bed.

(I know, presumptuous of me, hey? Haha).

Back in the day (when this happened) I was 32 and pretty damn sexy. I was at my thinnest ever and even in pink cotton pj’s, looked really hot.

I wasn’t sure if we were going to have sex but I was secretly hoping Patrick would follow me to bed and destroy me.

My wish came true 🙂

I fell asleep hours later with a satisfied smile. I think Patrick had slung a leg over mine as he started to snore and I liked that. I like that he didn’t assume I’d leave or offer me a lift home after sex. It was nice to just be snuggled up in bed with him. Special.

The next morning, my phone woke us up – a text from my friend Justin “You left your cd’s at my house – I’m on my way to drop them off to you”

Argh.

Justin was one of my guy besties and at first, I wasn’t that bothered by his text.

Patrick rolled over to face me and smiled. Oh my heart, he looked so cute.

“Morning sexy bum. I have a lecture at Uni first thing this morning” he sleepily said, closing his eyes and stretching.

That worked out well, actually. Hopefully Patrick didn’t mind dropping me off at a station on the way and I could meet Justin and collect my beloved cd’s. He’d had them for over a year and I was suddenly excited for the chance to get them back.

“But you know what?” Patrick continued

My stomach started to fill with butterflies. What was this, now?

“What?” I could hardly breathe. What was going on with me?

“I’d rather stay here. With you”

Oh.

My.

Life.

Patrick closed his eyes and smiled as he spoke “Let’s just sleep in for a bit – maybe go for breakfast and I’ll drop you home?”

SOLD.

I texted Justin back “I’m not home, dude – can you hang onto them until next time?”

“No way” Justin texted back “I fly out for a long swing so if you’re not home when I get there, I won’t see you again for about a month or so – maybe longer, I don’t know…”

Argghhhhh!

“What’s up?” Patrick asked, looking concerned.

I love that he genuinely cared.

I decided I really wanted my cd’s back.

As if reading my mind, Justin texted a picture of my leopard-print cd wallet leaning against my front door “Come get them, bestie”

I wanted so badly to stay with Patrick…this was definitely a new development to our ‘friends with benefits’ relationship. We usually just hit it and quit it…but Patrick wanted to sleep in with me? And breakfast? This was huge.

My phone beeped “Want these or not???” Justin was getting impatient.

Music won out and I asked Patrick to just take me home. Puzzled, he got dressed with me and we talked on the drive home with Patrick insisting on breakfast together before he dropped me off.

“I can’t this time, Patrick” It made my body ache to decline such an inviting, sexy offer “…Maybe next time?”

And Patrick dropped me off, waving a puzzled ‘bye’ as Justin bounded up to enfold me in a hug and bonk me on the head playfully with my cd case.

*sigh*