I get knocked down, but I get up again

And that’s the important thing, isn’t it? To get back up.

Last week at work, I got a severe bollocking from my boss. It was about 15 minutes of awfulness where she listed fault after fault after fault of mine (a lot of them untrue and uncalled for, by the way) and I just listened and nodded and whenever there was a gap (and there weren’t many) in the onslaught of listed failures, I’d say “sorry”.

I came away from that meeting (unplanned by the way, just a “come up and see me” so that I wasn’t prepared for it and didn’t have my notebook of support with me) battered and bruised.

When your boss has a go at you, it’s hard. I find it hard to be told off and I found it harder still that a lot of the things she brought up were not my doing or my fault.

I want to be the kind of person who stands up for herself. I want to be the woman who has a quiet but authorative voice, who can interject when someone is saying something that’s not right/not true and stand up for herself but I’m not. I’m the shivering wreck who just accepts it all.

I take the hit.

But I always get back up…so today I’m going to give myself props for that.

One step at a time, eh?

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